I totally got out of jury duty. Yes! It was hell, but it was only one day, thank god.

It was soooo boring. Pretty much you wait. And wait. Anddddddd Wait. Then someone says something for five minutes and you then wait some more. Zzzzz. A guy behind me actually was taking a nap.

There was this wicked creepy crazy old lady sitting next to me. For the whole time she was there she was picking at these scabs on her hand. One of the clerks at one point showed us all how to tear apart our jury summons. I remembered thinking, “who can’t rip apart a jury summons?” Sure enough, this woman didn’t rip hers. Handed it in whole. Then, when the first group of people went up to the jury box to see if they were fit to be on the jury, she wasn’t included in the group with them, but everytime someone asked a question like, “Do you think that would prevent you from doing your job as a juror?” she would raise her hand. He wasn’t asking you! Finally at one point right before lunch she just got up and left, never to return again.

I was part of the second group. The trial was an armed robbery of a Walmart. The whole day I was thinking of things I could say to get out of jury duty without being one of those pathetic saps who gave a sob story about how all this was such a hardship. Finally it dawned on me. When asked to say a little bit about myself I simply said, “I work in retail at the Bose Factory store in Manchester.” Huzzah! I was then asked if there had ever been any crimes in the store. “Well, we have had some shoplifting.” No defense attorney would want me now!

Sure enough they didn’t want me. It was a little anti-climatic though, as when we came back from a twenty minute recess we were told that the case had settled. Five of the people in my group still got selected for jury duty though, poor bastards. Me, I’m good for 6 years!