For the longest time I couldn’t move files from my old computer to my new one because I couldn’t find the software for my External ZipDrive. You can try to copy the files onto a disk and then move them, which is a slow process that doesn’t work. Other than that, you’re fucked.

That’s what I thought until I talked to my uncle Tim last week. He told me that you can download the drivers you need right off of the Iomega website. Yesterday I went there, and sure enough everything you need is right there for the taking. So I downloaded that yesterday and today I started the long task of moving files from one computer to the other.

Of course–I’m not going to lie to you–most of those files were porn and Kylie Minogue music videos. Throw in some MP3s and that was my day, folks. Why I felt the need to transfer a GIG of porn off of one hard drive onto the other, instead of just deleting it all, I’ll never know. Perhaps just for the joy of saying, “Yes, I’ve seen a pig fuck a woman, and I can show you what it looks like right here.” (Note: Before you get all creeped out, very little of my porn is actually that weird.)

One odd thing about the Zipdrive. Either it won’t spit out your Zip disk when you ask it to, leading to much frustration and yelling, or it pops out the disk with the velocity of a bullet leaving the barrel of a gun. The thing seriously scares me.

Zipdrives man, zipdrives…